{"product_id":"crippling-adulthood","title":"Crippling Adulthood","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eCrippling Adulthood: \u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\n\u003cspan class=\"a_GcMg font-feature-liga-off font-feature-clig-off font-feature-calt-off text-decoration-none text-strikethrough-none\"\u003eThis soap goes well with caffeine, back pain, and an early midlife crisis.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"310\" data-start=\"87\"\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003eYou finally have the freedom you wished for in childhood only to discover that that very freedom comes with chronic back pain, a tummy that requires lactaid pills to eat Mexican food and more bills than you care to think about. Well, I can't help with any of that but I did create a soap that will bring you sweet summer BBQ memories. This bar is a fresh melon blend that will leave you feeling refreshed, invigorated and hopefully mildly less depressed about your current state of life.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong style=\"font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'San Francisco', 'Segoe UI', Roboto, 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif; font-size: 0.875rem;\"\u003eWhat you need to know:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGently scented for those who don't want to smell like a perfume counter\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eFormulated especially for dry and sensitive skin\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMade with 100% goats milk\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHandmade in small batches\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis soap has been made with 100% goat's milk. Unlike other companies that dilute their soaps with a measly 10 or 25% goat's milk (seriously, who are they kidding?), we're going all in. Because when life gives you goats, you use 100% of their milk. Why settle for less when you can have the full goat's milk experience? Enjoy the benefits – goat's milk is not only gentle on the skin but also wildly moisturizing, leaving you with a glow so fabulous, your mirror is about to be jealous.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eIf you have sensitive or dry skin, this is the soap for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eIf you just like soap that smells yummy, this is also the soap for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"p1\"\u003eHonestly, it's soap. Everybody should probably use it in some form or another so why not have a soap that feels and smells good?\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Falcone Farm","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":47590669484222,"sku":"26000010","price":10.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0636\/4862\/8926\/files\/CripplingAdulthood.png?v=1780095060","url":"https:\/\/falconefarm.com\/products\/crippling-adulthood","provider":"Falcone Farm","version":"1.0","type":"link"}